I do not get angry easily.
For me it's a process really.
I'm hurt, upset.
and i let it build...
I lose it.
...but it doesn't happen often.
That said. I AM INFURIATED RIGHT NOW.
There was no building up this time.
Nope! I went straight to "stone-cold,punch-you-right-in-the-juglar,giggle-as-i-bury-your-body" ANGRY.
Tonight, someone (who's name will remain annoymous, mostly bc I do not want to be responsible for their death...) stepped over the line. WAaAAAAaaaYyYY over the line. So far past the line, the line looked like a dot.
This person started making what my husband does a contest. I don't see protecting us, working to keep our nation great, as any kind of a game. It's not fun and there are no winners... but Silas does it anyway because he sees it as HIS duty.
That sweet little piece of arrogance was telling me how my soldier hadn't seen enough war. As if any amount of war isn't enough. They said they knew people who'd seen more just because of the military branch he's in (as if one is superior to the other... aren't we all working for the same thing, people?!?). Whoah, whoah, whoah! My husband is AN INFANTRY SOLDIER. We don't know and probably never will know what he's seen. Do you know why?!? Because he didn't do it for bragging rights. It wasn't the money (because you know we're rolling in it... ;) ). It couldn't have been to travel (he's not a big fan of desert... lol).
These are (a few of) his reasons:
So, dear person of arrogance, if you think your reasons are bigger or more important, than I wish you a life time of happiness with your giant head :)
ps. if you EVER speak to me like that again... well, let's just say, you'll have to part your butt cheeks to see which direction you're walking ;)
("Bless your heart" ;) lol)
Sunday, September 4, 2011
I don't like to be touched.
Okay, Okay. Let me clarify before i start hearing, "I've SEEN you and silas together, you didn't seem to mind..." or "Oh, no. Does that mean i shouldn't hug you?!?"
A. My husband can touch me anytime he wants ;D
B. I LOVE to be hugged... by the people i love. If i know the hug is coming I'm prepared. Small children aren't a problem, i don't get upset... they're cute & know no barriers.
It's just the randoms, that freak me out.
No unneccesary contact for me!
You know, the old man at church who grabs your shoulder and welcomes you? Or my friend's mom that hugs me and squeezes? Pats on the back? The co worker that runs her fingers through my hair? A sneaky hug from behind (it doesn't matter who...)
Annnd when I say it freaks me out, I mean, I panic inside.
I turn into this rigid creature that can't move or speak.
My bones are lead.
I stand there with a frozen smile trying to reciprocate while my heart races.
Most of the time I get throught it with a sigh of relief and the other person barely notices.
Occasionally, I don't move, the other person, noticing I'm still breathing says, "You okay?!?"
Even more rare, I just get irritated and shake their touch off like a bad germ after they leave.
I'm a bit of a freak, but at least i'm good at faking the normal ;D lol.
So, there you have it...
This is probably a big surprise to those of you who are around me.
You're probably going, "Whaat?!? I thought she LOVED my hugs."
And, if I love you, I do ;)